WYSINWYG….
March 19, 2008
I, a meaning, comfort you.
nearby is complexity and literal significance.
the Eden vows elide gracefully:
even now the lines emerge mindlessly ordered.
cynicism keeps evolving, reaching out for the heart,
entities proliferate reaching every tenable ecological niche:
this is overkill; unless soon….
a new day tumbles harmlessly
emitting terrible ancient light;
electrifying new transience!
dawn is something a deity values and needs;
the air glows, encouraging daybreak….
I (no other) will be existence,
leading out nations,
guiding in new births,
overcoming tired history;
calming again towards evening,
genesis over.
rejoice in earth’s seasoning….
March 19, 2008 at 7:21 pm
For me, it would have been brilliant if,
first line had read:
‘I AM soon to come to comfort you’
Last line:
‘I AM then will be in existence here’
..
Angel adds, I AM also reads WE ARE
March 19, 2008 at 11:26 pm
This sounds suspiciously like real poetry. The title, howerver, which, unless I’m mistaken, stands for What You See Is Not What You Get, makes me wonder if I’m being had…
March 20, 2008 at 12:12 am
March 20, 2008 at 12:29 am
OK, go ahead, be enigmatic..
March 20, 2008 at 9:54 am
It’s just our naughty doggone doggerelist’s way, MaA. He loves nothing better than tweaking our tails, remember. . . I looked at the screen, and the lines were soon swimming — no, no reason. Oh alright, let’s just say that it’s spring and they are . . . what. Er tadpoles in a pond, why not. . . I am sorry but I hardly have any words in me at all, let alone the right ones, which are far out of reach.
Am at the end of a very long 24 hours (sleep-deprivation, packing, a drive of several hundred miles, shopping, unpacking, cooking) so please excuse all idiocy.
‘reaching out for the heart,’
. . . and succeeding to the highest degree imaginable — and quite possibly beyond that.
Some words from the long-ago past keep coming to mind, every time I think of this trollocks site and every other connection. They were on the frontispiece of the first adult book I was ever given — as a prize for … never mind the official reason, I’ve always known that it was really for being too cowardly to make any trouble. Hard to believe now, I know, but how I loved that book. . . So here are the lines:
‘Everyman, I will go with thee, and be thy guide
In thy most need to go by thy side.’
I haven’t the faintest idea of who is supposed to be guiding whom; can only be sure of the always side-by-side, and if I’m being enigmatic, it’s only because I want to try my hand at wysinwyg too. ( yes, a copycatnerd
)
March 20, 2008 at 10:13 am
From Urban Dictionary:
Trollocks — “Save your trollocks for people who haven’t read it a hundred times before. If you’re so socialy inadequate you can’t get people to talk to you without behaving like a socially inadequate imbecile, try the Samaritans.”
Wordnerd,
Now is that fair to the Samaritans!
March 20, 2008 at 10:55 am
. . . oh Angel . . . [helpless laughter] . . . I should have checked on the net . . . mine . . . all MINE, I was sure that idea was . . .
March 20, 2008 at 11:22 am
I have been dizzy lately, that’s why the halo slipped to the side; in all innocence, am I being misunderstood?
Likely now, you may not believe what I meant!
March 20, 2008 at 11:45 am
Knowledge is the guide, Everyman the guided, Death the destination.
http://www.fordham.edu/halsall/basis/everyman.html
CS: a previously unadmitted admiration for David Gascoyne? Or maybe Paul?
March 20, 2008 at 3:31 pm
I am cynical steve gentle mocker of the pretentious and the talent disadvantaged. I now belong in both categories.
Wot, no rhymes?
March 20, 2008 at 3:50 pm
congrats to MM for solving my childish puzzle….
I feared you’d all think I’d lost my marbles , so hesitated quite a while before posting this (and couldn’t comment earlier without giving the game away)….it was rather silly, but I couldn’t resist….I thought it would be easier to write some sort of (in)coherent poem from a series of initials, but it was surprisingly tough – thus proving (as if further proof were necessary) that I can’t write real poetry….of course, the resulting “poem” was just another of my thinly veiled pops at the vague stuff that often passes for proper poetry….reassuring that Mishari smelt the rat early….and apologies to angela – no offence was intended towards any religion: you’ll perhaps accept my explanation that one run of letters suggested a certain phrase, and the tone of the whole spoof followed from that….
Will follow Billy’s link later & look up David Gascoyne before replying (and pretending I knew his poetry already….)
Thanks for being good sports….
March 20, 2008 at 4:29 pm
I don’t get it! With the alterations to the two lines that I put up, it is a very religious poem; sure it isn’t with yours.
Just in case you do not realize ‘I AM’, the creator’s name.
…
reeling at present. ‘The Orange Longlist confirms the prize’s relevance.’ march 20
anytimefrances 1004354
“I support women, when they’re right. I hate men, but I support them too – when they’re right! (so long as they don’t come near me.)” Please check that I have this correct; I find it an astounding comment.
Somewhere stated by someone that another blog was started late last year after some disagreement. Parties hived off away from Guardian Books?
March 20, 2008 at 5:03 pm
angela, anytimefarces is even more deranged than I thought. She’s now taken to trawling the web for my posts to other sites and posting them on Carol’s thread. To what end? I have no idea. I seriously think phsyciatric intervention is called for.
March 20, 2008 at 5:31 pm
Mishari,
Saw a reference to Max Gogarty; don’t know the story, but not relevant to Carol’s thread. Simply press ‘report this comment’, leave it to moderator, whether then acted on or not, is not worth commenting on; it all becomes hot air.
I thought the ‘talk policy’ of all newspapers had the ‘no questions will be entered into’ byline.
March 20, 2008 at 6:55 pm
Bizarrely, today looks like being one of the highest days ever for visits to this site – despite not plugging it for ages, and despite the schoolboy nature of the latest post….people looking for spin-off gossip from the various GU spats perhaps? Whatever the reason, it’s about time I said thanks to the regulars for their support; and welcome to any hypothetical lurkers – please feel free to post (you can always use a fictitious email address on the posting form if you’re so inclined….)
angela – I’m not a fan of those “report this comment” buttons; I’ve never used them and never will….I personally think anything short of the gratuitously obscene or libellous shouldn’t be censored….
Mishari – my policy is to ignore atf’s more outlandish comments….I don’t think conflict helps in this instance, and I don’t wish her any harm….it was a shame Billy’s thread became derailed in that way. Maybe the GU people need to define exactly how they see their blogs – it’s the nature of debate that one comment elicits a follow-up; familiarity leads to banter….the only way to prevent that is to restrict commenters to one post per thread….at which point I’d probably walk away….the most prolific off-topic commenter is undoubtedly the multiply reincarnated PA, but I mostly scroll by his stuff and don’t see why those equally uninterested in mine can’t do the same….he has a harem who presumably are dedicated enough to wade through his whatever-it-is-he-writes in search of the elusive point, and I see no reason to deny them their daily fix.
Incidentally, does anyone go to his literature lovers forum any more? I lurked for a while after wordnerd, Billy and myself stopped posting there, but it frankly seemed to have died; and PA himself lost interest in it. A while back there had been no activity for a whole month….
March 20, 2008 at 8:08 pm
Billy, thank you so much for this:
‘Knowledge is the guide, Everyman the guided, Death the destination.’
I’ll say, not for the first time, that I’m fascinated by associative memory. I haven’t thought of those lines or the context in which I first read them for perhaps 30 years, maybe more.
I haven’t hopped on the link yet, but will.
. . . Too tired to post any more at present. . . Thanks everyone else for a lovely read. . . Oh, just one thing, Mishari. I agree with Steve about there being absolutely no point in fighting with atf. I don’t know what the trouble is. She has good days and simply terrible ones; has told us bits and pieces of a harrowing life story.
March 20, 2008 at 9:15 pm
Steve and wordy, I agree. It’s just that, as a naturally combative man, any personal attack tends to provoke a reaction from me. I’ve always regarded ‘turn the other cheek’ as the philosophy of a madman. Still, you should be proud of me. I’ve ignored ATF latest looniness and intend to ignore all her posts in future.
Like you, Steve, I’d no more ‘report this comment’ or complain about another poster to the moderators than I’d kill and eat Pongo.
I should have seen what your game was with WYSINWYG, the title was a tip-off, sadly the turbo-charger I’ve taken out of Porche and installed in my brain still has a few bugs. Of course, mowbray lives exclusively on fish and fish is the brain food par excellence.
March 20, 2008 at 9:23 pm
“Of course, mowbray lives exclusively on fish…”
….he’d better keep an eye out for one-legged whalers….
Mishari’s avatar seems to have disappeared….could be the wordpress software playing up again as I haven’t been getting email notification of comments here as should happen….
March 20, 2008 at 9:24 pm
“Mishari’s avatar seems to have disappeared…”
….and now it’s back again….
March 20, 2008 at 10:12 pm
Yeah, I noticed that too and when I tried to log in to gravatar.com, the site was down. I think that was the problem.
March 20, 2008 at 10:22 pm
BTW, your ‘poem’ did make me wonder. I did smell a rat, but wasn’t entirely sure. Had it been utter shite, well, no problem, but it wasn’t.
I don’t know if you noticed, but Billy posted a query on his thread regarding the mods deletion policy…and it was deleted. Perfect. The mods really do verge on moronic. Billy’s question was perfectly courteous and eminently reasonable. How do these idiots get their jobs? They can’t all be Rusbridger’s children, surely?
March 20, 2008 at 10:47 pm
Re Report buttons, like you doggerelist I have never used it. However I have been reported many times, been deleted a few and accept that that is the right of the moderator.
March 20, 2008 at 11:08 pm
Michele to Angela – sorry for the delay in responding to your design idea – interesting idea. Very much in the art jewellery vein.
March 20, 2008 at 11:22 pm
To my knowledge, and not counting the mass culls like today where all sorts get caught in the backwash, I’ve only been deleted three times on GU: once for calling Blair a c*** (yes: in doggerel….I still have a paper copy….); once for posting the lyrics of the Ying Tong song on a religion thread; and once for insulting a marketing guy….three excusable peccadilloes as I’m sure you’ll all agree….no idea whether I was reported by someone, or it was a McDoom solo initiative….
March 20, 2008 at 11:57 pm
You insulted a marketing guy? You brute. How could you be so insensitive? Marketing guys are human too. Erm…actually, I’m not sure about that bit. I’ll look into it.
March 21, 2008 at 12:03 am
OK, you’re in the clear. Just checked with the wife and she says marketing guys are closely related to slime mold. My mistake.
March 21, 2008 at 12:15 am
I’ve been tempted to delete my own comments many times. The only time I objected was when my description of Derek Draper as a fucking wanker was binned. Seems justifiable to me.
I must say there are a few people on GU I wouldn’t like to play Monopoly with.
March 21, 2008 at 2:05 pm
Ah well, if the facility to delete one’s own comments were available, I’d be a busy boy wooden-staking all those vampire posts which, although rib-ticklingly hilarious at midnight, have all the humour sucked out when brushed with the merest shaft of sunlight….
March 21, 2008 at 2:17 pm
Your 28 Steve, very expressive. However the ‘boy with his tongue out,’ doesn’t look much like a vampire.
Just a thought Steve: while the dating, as of a diary, does show most recent work, maybe though, it does not entice people to comment on your previous offerings.
March 21, 2008 at 3:53 pm
That’s sadly the way the blog software works angela – most recent at the top, oldest down below….so anyone coming here for the first time reads everything in reverse order….and since more recent doggerels sometimes make little sense except in conjunction with older ones, newcomers may well be bemused rather than amused….I think there’s a way to have a static front page with individual posts linked chronologically and that’s something I’m still considering….
Meanwhile, I’m determined to do a ghazal before Carol’s thread closes; and am still tinkering with that Adam’n'Eve’n'the apple piece I mentioned some time ago….
“However the ‘boy with his tongue out,’ doesn’t look much like a vampire.”
….but the werewolf resemblance is, you must admit, uncanny….
March 21, 2008 at 11:50 pm
Looking forward to seeing your effort, cs. I was vexed about not rhyming those first two lines, particularly irritating since I’d written out the rules and had them by me. In ‘real life’ our cat snuffed it last summer and I was quite pleased since I was finally able to fit the new back door which had been standing in the shed for the last three years. I really didn’t want to cut a cat-flap in it and every year he looked like he was on his last legs. I’m sure he perked up just to spite me. I’m not sentimental, but I have to admit to a catch in the voice and a tear in the eye when we interred him in the garden, just as I did when various hamsters, guinea pigs and gerbils went the same way. It always surprised me until I realised it was a token of regret for the ever-increasing speed of the passage of time.
March 22, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Now will you all please read WYSINWYG with the simple additions I added and tell me what other powers exist in control?
Will be interested in your Adam and Eve story, doggerel; Paradise Lost or Paradise Regained?
March 22, 2008 at 1:15 pm
….Paradise parodied, I fear….
March 22, 2008 at 3:04 pm
I had hoped it would be a nice story.
March 22, 2008 at 5:17 pm
It’ll be the traditional story – woman caught scrumping in defiance of landowner; convicted without trial; innocent party co-evicted along with guilty; no statute of limitations for descendants, all of whom are assumed to share woman’’s guilt; and so on….just not in blank verse….
MM – my ghazal (or ghazal derivative) is likely to be posted here rather than on Carol’s thread….it turned out rather different than expected (although not quite finished yet)….
I was wondering about having a themed post here where we could pick an interesting form and a fun theme which we could all play with; definitely *not* a competition, more a festival….any thoughts?
March 22, 2008 at 5:30 pm
Steve, I popped over to borrow a cup of ghazal having expected it to appear over at GU. Never mind. Good idea about a theme and a form. As I’ve been playing around with the form, how about villanelles on…censorship? The form is tricky enough to be an interesting challenge and the subject of being deleted is one close to many hearts. Just a thought.
March 22, 2008 at 8:22 pm
‘Whatever the reason, it’s about time I said thanks to the regulars for their support;’
The wrong way around, dgg. It’s we who must thank you for the delightful looniness of this site.
Btw, I enjoy ogling veggies. Any chance of you posting pics of the patch where the smiling man with the shopping bag had been picking, in the first set of human photographs?
March 22, 2008 at 8:26 pm
‘“However the ‘boy with his tongue out,’ doesn’t look much like a vampire.”
….but the werewolf resemblance is, you must admit, uncanny….’
Angel and dgg,
Surely a fox, more likely — with that flaming red hair?
But to check, why not get in touch with the Nez Perce tribe and ask if they’ll lend you a Howlbox with the latest release of their werewolf programme? (see extract below) . . . Assuming, of course, that you’ve been diligent enough to put GPS collars on local members of the species?
If not, why not make that a project for Mowbray. What does he have to do now that he’s bumped off the family moggy to put up his beastly (sorry, beastless) door? (Btw, does anyone know what on earth this sentence of his is supposed to mean: ‘It always surprised me until I realised it was a token of regret for the ever-increasing speed of the passage of time.’ How does it relate to the preceding sentences about pet morbidity???)
I know that I should really post the first sentence of this clip at GU, since it proves that PA has been confusing poets with wolves (though better, I’d say, than CR confusing you lot with garden moles) – only, anytimefusspot will shriek about the cut-and-paste:
‘the famous call-and-response among wolves can be used to count and keep track of the animals.
Tricked by technology, scientists say, wolves will answer what amounts to a roll call triggered by a remotely placed speaker-recorder system called Howlbox. Howlbox howls, and the wolves howl back. Spectrogram technology then allows analysis that the human ear could never achieve — how many wolves have responded, and which wolves they are.’
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/03/19/science/earth/19howl.html?_r=1&ref=us&oref=login
March 22, 2008 at 9:04 pm
Mishari 36.
Wordnerd,
I realize driving long distances are disorientating; are you sure you have had enough rest? Did you bay all night?
March 22, 2008 at 10:04 pm
A neat description of the Fall, cs. I like your idea and the villanelle is a form I’ve never made a serious effort to use. Censorship sounds interesting as a subject, but you would have to decide how it was going to be defined. Total freedom, man, or a specified subject area?
Mishari, if you return(sorry about this,cs)I took the liberty of sending an email to your gmail address about a security issue.
God, shades of the Larkin thread, I suppose I shall have to provide a crib for wn7. Deficient in foreign language skills, yes, mildly abusive, yes, but slow-witted hadn’t crossed my cognitive threshold up to this point. So, what I was saying in the sentence you refer to was that a shallow, self-obsessed person such as my good self was surprised to(apparently)feel something like emotion at the demise of small creatures previously seen as marginally interesting hunks of animated matter. Later, however, I realised that my sorrow related merely to what the death of these animals portended, ie mine. The life span and death of each creature, in other words, marked off another closed episode in the rapidly shortening story of my life. Not that difficult.
March 22, 2008 at 10:33 pm
btw wordnerd your “Its we who must thank you for the delightful looniness of this site!”
Please speak only for yourself wordnerd, we weren’t the ones out last night under the moon!
March 22, 2008 at 11:14 pm
wordnerd – I have no plans to post potato patch pics….I suspect it would be a sure-fire way to haemmorhage readers….and howlboxes would be unnecessary here: there are plenty of identifiable nighttime screeches from the numerous foxes and owls….as well as unidentifiable noises, which may or may not correspond to the occasional rumours of big cats….
I like the idea of villanelles as a form, even if it’s only MM, Mishari and myself taking part – shall we wait until Billy’s back after Easter, in the hope that he’ll join in? (I may be presumptious in this, given that he’s a pro….) It would be great if we could persuade some others, including angela, as it would only be for fun….perhaps when we’ve decided, I’ll mention it on one of the GU blogs….
March 22, 2008 at 11:25 pm
Don’t be dense, wordy. Mowbray was merely pointing out that the passing of a cat, (possibly a long-time pet), marks the ever-increasing speed of the passage of time. Perhaps you’re still sweet sixteen and it’s a phenomenon you’ve yet to notice, but believe me, when you get to my age, (and mowbray’s, I believe he was born the same year as I was), it is an alarming and increasingly noticable phenomenon.
Steve, I think we can give snaps of your spud patch a miss. I mean, flowers are one thing but potatos?
MM, will check my gmail now and get back to you shortly.
March 23, 2008 at 12:17 am
BTW, Steve, I’ll second wordy’s sentiment. Thanks are due you for maintaining a site for the rowdy kids from the back of the classroom to play in without fear of deletion.
March 23, 2008 at 12:29 am
. . . Sigh. . . Nothing to be done about my denseness and slow wits, Misharious, and Angel, would you please join my plea for veg-on-the-vine pics? (Gosh does it feel lonely in this doggone patch today — not least because of these mentions of cloak-and-dagger conferences by gmail.)
Why would it take all the way to the death of a pet to feel the years pitter-pattering faster down the labyrinths of time? The first white hairs in the muzzle of a dog loved by me are enough of a trigger for that train of thought.
Ah, but dgg, identifying a screech as belonging to a fox is one thing; knowing from spectrography that it’s the fox called Steve and not the one whose ID tag reads Mishari is another — no?
Since you mention it, the moonlight has been sensational, where I am now. At three in the morning, I can walk outside seeing every branch and nearly every leaf without the help of artificial light. The whole landscape is pale and pearly.
March 23, 2008 at 12:54 am
Don’t rub it in, wordy. We’re getting snowed on.
March 23, 2008 at 2:57 am
No snow here….anyway, we took no pictures of the veg….too busy picking and scoffing when the site was productive….all that remains now is the asparagus and rhubarb; well overgrown, but I shall still be disappointed if we don’t get the usual glut of asparagus come May….all grown from seed: they’re cheap and easy if you’re patient….
March 23, 2008 at 5:23 am
wordnerd,
understood; do you have choko vines there, I’ve had no success.
I’m glad I’m an angel and don’t have to become concerned with security risks; reading through the muddle they make though, does cause one to wonder.
The straight road from A to B is best, particularly if it has no traffic on it.
Back to vines, I have a most beautiful flowering vine; if only I could use the digital camera (8 pixel, I think), then if only I could scan (yes have the scanner), then maybe you could identify doggerelist, it draws much comment, had thought it was dutch man’s pipe, but it is more exotic.
ps. Wordnerd, do you think they are plotting?
March 23, 2008 at 2:53 pm
Never grown any aristolochias, angela – most are far too tender for these parts….couldn’t even find a good pictorial page online, so can’t even direct you to a helpful page….
Have spent some time googling David Gascoyne – can see why Billy thought I might have been aping him with the above….although there’s not a lot of his actual poetry online, I like much of what I found….reading him is a stop-start experience; I was constantly being shocked by the unexpected word….
March 23, 2008 at 4:47 pm
1954 was a vintage year in so many ways. It was a minor shock to see that Anthony Minghella, famous son of the IoW, was also a ‘54 man (also age 54, a neat coincidence-or was it?) as I always put him a year or two older than me. His mother was our councillor for a while in the 80s. Every few months her constituents received a newsletter recording the many achievements of Anthony and his relatives, including their exam results, degree classes and full details of their brilliant professional lives. This created considerable resentment among the less well-off/less gifted/less successful recipients, that is nearly all of them. Perhaps partly for this reason I wasn’t a fan of AM’s stuff. His TV plays were pretty dire and ‘Truly Madly Deeply’ was sentimental mush. Will God forgive him for ‘The English Patient’? I don’t think I can.
David Gascoyne was also a resident of the IoW, cs. It’s the cultural heart of the south.
March 23, 2008 at 5:46 pm
Yes, I clocked the Gascoyne IoW link….and during my searches, eagerly clicked on the poem “November in Devon”….wherein only a surrealist could talk more about Launceston, Hinckley Point and Bournemouth (not to mention Whitehall)….Devon’s clearly done a Topsy since last I looked at the map….and one other thing I learned from searching: never, ever, ever follow a link to the Poemhunter site – that site’s so poisoned with pop-up ads….spybot & AVG will clear the detritus, but it’s fucking annoying….
March 23, 2008 at 5:55 pm
Alright I think I’ve done one. I’ll post it here and then again when you all do yours on another page.
Villanelles at La Rosiere
Step outside there’s a nip in the air
Gloves protecting hands still numb
Morning’s breath of icy stare
Slopes invite skiers at La Rosiere
Regaled in bomber jackets and hoods
Step outside there’s a nip in the air
Merrily Pierre and my friend Clair
Laughing they join in the fun
Morning’s breath of icy stare
Sparkling Shine highlights hair
Glistening eyes and moist their lashes
Step outside there’s a nip in the air
Little by little it melts the air
Laughter’s tears near solid form
Morning’s breath of icy stare
Castle in the air calls morning prayer
Awakened by the bell’s sharp pealing
Step outside there’s a nip in the air
Morning’s breath of icy stare
……..
Think that’s it; didn’t believe I would like to do one, but actually I’m quite pleased.
March 23, 2008 at 5:58 pm
Yes, 1954 was a great year. They stopped building great models after that. The care and attention to detail, the good old-fashioned craftsmanship are just lacking in later models. I was a bit taken aback by Minghella’s untimely demise. I mean, 54, that’s practically the first careless flush of youth, or so I tell myself, though the white hairs in the sink when I shave try to contradict me. Basically, I’m just a happy-go-lucky kid, Huck Finn with a good library.
Steve, I know what you mean about Gascoyne.
Lines like:
‘And lovers float down from the cliffs like rain.’
are arresting.
You’re right, MM, about Truly, Madly, Deeply. I watched it with my wife a few years ago. About half way through it, she turned to me and said, ‘My God, this is awful.’ I kissed her warmly for that. Not that I need an excuse.
March 23, 2008 at 7:06 pm
angela, good try, but the rhyme scheme should be:
ABA,ABA,ABA, and the last quatrain ABAA…you’re close, though, just a little re-write and I hope you won’t mind my suggesting you lose the ‘dong’. The word has rather unfortunate connotations.
Many years ago, in Madagascar, I amused myself by teaching a gang of local youths to greet male tourists with the words,’ Hey, bozo, how’s your dong hanging?’ and female tourists with the words,’yo, mama, how’s your old wazoo?’
The wretched ingrates re-payed my kindness by teaching me to say, ‘hello, how are you to-day?’, in Malagasy, or so I thought.
The first time I tried it out on the market ladies, they fell into their fruit and vegetables laughing. I soon had a crowd of them surrounding me and demanding I repeat it as they wept with laughter.
I subsequently discovered that what I’d actually been saying was,’my penis is small but shapely.’
They did, however, compliment my accent and I was a firm favourite with the market mamas for the rest of my stay.
March 23, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Mishari,
I actually checked the word in the dictionary, you are correct; it is best avoided particularly by an angel. You may not believe this but to the best of my knowledge I have never before used a ‘four’ letter word; I doubt that I could live it down with my associates. However I did note its primary use was as I had thought.
Perhaps I’ll soon be recalled; my reputation in tatters.
Re rhyme, starting to sound like hard work; I’m allergic.
March 23, 2008 at 11:27 pm
I wouldn’t normally do this but….if you want, angela, I’ll edit the comment & replace the offending word – just give me an alternative….
BTW – I’d envisaged if & when we have our villanelle fest (or whatever we decide upon) that you would send them to me via email, so I can post them all simultaneously up top, rather than have them hidden away in the comments….if that meets approval….
March 24, 2008 at 1:26 am
Thank you doggerelist if you can at present change to ‘bell’s sharp peeling’ and delete the offending one, Head Office may overlook.
However I gather my rhyming is also out.
March 24, 2008 at 1:48 am
….done! although I took the liberty (bell) of substituting “pealing”….
Don’t worry about the rhyming….I liked your villanelle….
March 24, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Steve, I liked angela’s poem as well, but if it’s to be a villanelle, it has to stick to certain rules, (oh,Christ, I sound like anytimefarces). It would be an easy matter to fix it, I reckon. Just a matter of making the B lines rhyme. You got everything else right, angela.
March 24, 2008 at 2:35 pm
Didn’t understand, even read wiki, still didn’t pick it up. I now see, all ‘B’ lines must rhyme; it is a rigid form though. I do really like free verse, it expands more readily (excuse please); not saying I don’t like the muscial flow of normal rhyme, it is very even.
Actually doggerelist did have ‘pealing’ typed on my own copy so thank you for the correction.